it was a fine sunday morning. and i was at my uncle's place. i was quietly sitting with with my thoughts and uncle. when suddenly out of the blue uncle asked me
" who are you? or how would you answer the question 'who am i'".
to be honest i was scared. this is a really scary question to answer. i gathered my courage and was just about to open my mouth when he said
"take your time. am not in a hurry"
i took a deep breath. i thought. i have answered this question before in interviews. i can do so now.
i said " my name is blah blah, i have done blah blah and so on." i had just finished the fourth line when he said
" whatever you are saying is your achievements, your qualifications, your name etc. who are you?"
now i was perplexed. his reputation for being spiritual, knowledgeable and practical was wide spread. so i thought again. this time for fifteen minutes. i still did not know what to say.
" who am i? i dont know." i said
"oh dont worry. take your time." he said.
seriously who am i? again i started saying i am the son of so and so....i am a good person...
he said " again this is your nature and your relationship. who are you"
i guess my blank face convinced him to answer.
and he said" you are the owner of varun goel."
"what the hell" were my precise thoughts.
" you are the one who sits behind and quietly watches varun do whatever he does. you dont do anything. you dont speak. you dont have a nature. you dont take part in anything. whatever is done is done by varun. you just sit quietly and watch him. you are his owner."
" oh so i just control his thoughts and see what he does." i said
"no. you dont think. that is what varun does. you only see. you dont make decisions. you know everything. you see everything. you are the king."
"but the king gives orders, doesn't he?" i said
"you dont give orders. you only watch him do the work. he does all the work. whoever talks, talks to him. not you. you only listen.you are deep inside. sitting quietly."
i thought over it. that is great i thought. it kinds of explain spirit and all that. even al capone, the famous gangster of new york said that he never killed anyone. it was al capone. he was a loving person.
but i did not feel satisfied. why is he telling me that. what do i do about it? why is he still smiling at me?
WHAT AM I MISSING?
i asked him"so what? i mean what does it mean? what do i learn from it?"
he smiled again." if you understand that you are his owner and you do not do anything, and it is only varun who is doing all the work, then you wont mind if someone says anything to you."
he continued" if everyone understood this little fact then there would be no disharmony. nobody would take abuses personally. they will understand they are not being abused. it is the body who is being abused. it is the name.nobody can harm you or say anything to you. you dont die. nothing happens to you. you are god."
it finally clicked me. he is so correct. we are nothing but souls. everything else ie; our name, our fame our body, everything is given to us. we own everything. but we are not it.
WHO AM I?
I AM THE OWNER OF VARUN GOEL.
I AM ONE WITH GOD.